Change can be hard. Super hard!
And it can be hard because the most common formula used to create change is this:
I am going to/not going to ‘carry out X action’ to get ‘Y result’
You can set goals, build charts, make plans and yet still fail to actually make the change you desire.
This is why so many people fail to stick to the promises they make to themselves.
Because they attempt to make changes at the point of action e.g. going to the gym, eating less, not scrolling through crap, being focused.
But step back for a moment and consider this question:
What drives action?
Action is fabricated from your thoughts and/or your emotions.
Now I could go deeper into thoughts & emotions but we can save that for another email and skip straight into the part that drives your thoughts & emotions and then your actions…
Your Identity is how you see yourself and who you believe you are.
We touched on this in the previous email when we talked about character. Character is essentially Identity.
So if your Identity is holding you back from creating a better life for yourself in future, then you must change who you believe you are.
Now you’re probably thinking – “why would my identity be holding me back in the first place?”
People struggle with looking at their present selves and their future selves as two different people.
And the reason you struggle to look at your future self as different to who you are now is simple…
It’s far easier to remember the past than to imagine the future.
We assume that things will pretty much be the same in X amount of years as they are now.
Which means that when you try to become someone new it doesn’t stick because your current identity doesn’t agree!
During the 12 month build up to Special Forces selection I saw myself AS a Special Forces soldier.
This made it easy to put the work in and make the necessary sacrifices.
We see ourselves as the fully evolved, finished version so when we try to make changes that don’t adhere to our future selves, they won’t stick because our identity doesn’t agree!
If you assume that in the future you will most likely be who you are now then you will remain exactly as you are.
But, if you see your future self as a much more improved version who is happier, healthier, wealthier, and someone who stays disciplined then decision making in the present will adhere to your future self.
No matter what your past is or what you have been through, you can change your identity.
It’s time to stop attaching yourself so much to the person you think you are,
And start thinking of yourself as who you want to be in the future!
THIS is how you change your identity.
“We know what we are, but not what we may be.”- William Shakespeare
Get rid of the attachment you have to who you previously were or who you think you are,
And let go of the idea that your future self is exactly who you are today!
Start creating your ideal future identity and build a process that creates small wins to reinforce this new narrative.
As this feedback loop becomes stronger you will become that future self.
Once you start cementing this new identity in your subconscious mind then change becomes easy.
You WILL start pulling through on tasks and goals you set yourself.
You WILL begin to see true progress towards the future you want.
And you WILL finally start building the self-discipline you have longed for.
To wrap up… Change either feels forceful and difficult or a natural progression.
It all depends on the process you adopt!
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